Family values

I spoke to an old friend of mine, recently, who lives in Australia. We where best friends at varsity. I was not a born again Christian at the time. He lives his life as a homosexual man, but our friendship is so strong that we have remained friends, despite our differences in Spiritual matters.

His love and friendship over the years has led to something miraculous... He tolerates me speaking about God, miracles, the church and Bible, without getting into disagreement with me.

Last week as we spoke, he said the most amazing thing, and it made me wonder how many Christians have ever grasped this concept?

He said to me “It would appear to me, that what you believe is true, because I know that you are not crazy. But it also seems that parallel to the reality that you live in, is the reality I live in. Both realities seem equally real.”

Without knowing exactly what amazing revelation he had, he indirectly got hold of the truth that there are 2 kingdoms operating on earth, that of darkness and of light.

The WORD says:

Matthew 6 (Amplified Bible) (also Luke 11)

9 Pray, therefore, like this: Our Father Who is in heaven, hallowed be Your name.

10 Your kingdom come, Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.

The word COME is so interesting to me...

Q It doesn’t say:  Your kingdom STAY in heaven, until we die and become part of it.”

It says:

10 Your kingdom come, Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.

What is a kingdom?

It is a system of authority. I am not sure if you have noticed, but God is a God of order. By order, I don’t mean a God of no surprises or even a boring God.

One of the few times I audibly heard God, was when I was driving my car. I had been questioning the way creation came about, and what God’s roll was in it.

This is what He said to me: “I am the only random force that leads to order”.

What He was saying to me is that nothing created happened by accident...

Jeremiah 29:11 tells us that no matter how random it may seem that we are born, God has a plan for you

I wonder how many of you know that King Solomon, one of the wisest men who ever lived, who wrote the most of the book of Proverbs, was the son of King David and Bathsheba. You all know how wrong their relationship started.

This is one of the most amazing examples to me of how God would take that which we have done wrong, and repented to Him, and turn it into, not only good, but, the bloodline of Christ himself.

So if you are a child of Godless people, or your family told you that you where and accident or you where a baby conceived out of rape, or out of wedlock, surely the story of Solomon will teach you that God still has a plan for you.

Look at the Old Testament. It is a system, a Law to teach us that order is a good thing.

But humans are not perfect, and it is impossible for us not to become “out of order” at times.

The New Testament takes it further and teaches us that “ORDER without LOVE is a CURS”, because too much order leaves no room for love.

Jesus proved that when he told the Pharisees to pick up the first STONE to kill the adulteress woman.

There was a Law in place, an orderly structure to deal with the problem, but Jesus chose to supersede this Law and to replace it with love and forgiveness. This incident could possibly be seen by some as breaking the Law, yet God says that Jesus not only did not have any sin, He also fulfilled the entire Law.

Why am I speaking about Law and structures?

Because if we understand how the Kingdom of God on earth and in heaven operates, we would also understand the importance of the family structure as well as the grace that is needed to turn “family structure” into a place where Gods kingdom and WILL is reflected and a GOD KIND OF LOVE is grown.

The WORD says:

James 2:10

For whosoever keeps the Law [as a] whole but stumbles and offends in one [single instance] has become guilty of [breaking] all of it.

Without LOVE the structure of family is just as much a curse, as the Old Testament Set of rules that did not include Love or Grace and left no space for mistakes.

What does God say about the order of authority?

1 Timothy 3:5

For if a man does not know how to rule his own household, how is he to take care of the church of God?

.........Look at Jesus’ relationship with his disciples

Thinking about the way Jesus loved his diciples, so should a man love his family, and thinking about how the disciples loved Jesus, so should a family love the father of the house.

What type authority is needed to take care of the household?

Ephesians 5:21-23

21 Be subject to one another out of reverence for Christ (the Messiah, the Anointed One).

(....Why must we be subject to each other? “Out of reverence for Christ!”)

22 Wives, be subject (be submissive and adapt yourselves) to your own husbands as [a service] to the Lord.

23 For the husband is head of the wife as Christ is the Head of the church, Himself the Savior of [His] body.

Ephesians 6:1

Children, obey your parents in the Lord [as His representatives], for this is just and right.

8. God’s order is: God, Jesus, Man, Wife, Children

Does this mean that God loves men more than woman, or woman more than children?   NO

Galatians 3:28

There is [now no distinction] neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is not male and female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus.

What this means, is that God does not regard men as being more important, or grownups being more important or holy than children.

God designed each of us to be a certain way, to fit into an order that leads to a successful life.

Q Why are we getting it so wrong when it comes to our roles in God’s structure?

Q Why did woman decide in the 1960’s and 70’s that they no longer want to stand in the traditional role of woman?

Q Could it be that we have taken our authority over each other out of context to what God wanted in the first place?

Q Do we use worldly ideas of authority to do what we think, instead of what God wants?

What is our information or wisdom about leadership?

All we have to do is look at the leadership all over the world to know that we have a crisis.

Is leadership having all the power in one person’s hand and using it?

Q Did Jesus make all the decisions or did He ask the Father what to do?

Lets think what that means... how did Jesus rule over the church and His disciples when He was on earth?

Q Did he lead a life as dictator of the church?

Q Did he ever raise His hand to the church?

Q Did he have Judas killed when he knew that Judas was going to betray him?

or

Q Did He give his life so the church could have life?

Q Did He lead a life of poverty, so that His church could have “life and life abundant”?

Q Did He humble himself as a servant to his church by washing their feet?

What I understand from this is that being the head of a house, in the structure of God, is a life of service, sacrifice and love.

Look at how Jesus handled the people around him...

The adulteress woman

Peter who denied him

Judas who betrayed him

Jesus used God’s wisdom to solve every problem.

Not His loud voice

Not His superior position

He never threatened anybody

He never put Himself above His church

Now lets look at the wife...

Q If she is the church, how does she have to treat her husband?

Q Should the church be afraid of Christ?

Q Should the church love Jesus against their will or is it a choice?

or

Q Should the church be in love with Jesus to the point of giving up the old life and beginning a new life?

Q Can the church have more than one Jesus or false Gods?

Q Should the church only love Jesus outwardly?

What I find interesting is that in the eyes of God, not only does He love us equally, but also we both seem to have the same assignment or job:

“Service, sacrifice and love”

Woman: The world’s kingdom tells us that men must be warm and fussy... but that is also not true. God gave men a much stronger emotional constitution, so that they would not cry every time they have to kill a bear to save the sheep. They where built to be warriors, hunters and fighters.

Men: The world’s kingdom tells us that woman should be ruthless and hardcore...this is also not true. If woman didn’t set the emotional tone in the house, the children would wear steel wool diapers, and girls would only get to date when they where 40! Woman where built to be warm and fussy. We are the ones who enforce love.

Q Why is the world so obsessed with changing roles and questioning authority?

Families as a structure are not working, because we are trying to do it our way, instead of, God’s way.

I had an interesting revelation, talking to my sister on this issue this afternoon...

If men are the rule giver in the house and woman are the primary love and grace giver.

Then men reflect the Old Testament and woman the New Testament.

Together we are a reflection of the complete Word/Bible (also names referring to Jesus) Thus we achieve Christ likeness in our unity.

The worst part is... that we thought God had it wrong when in reality we are destroyed for our own lack of knowledge.

Interesting - STUDY

A Swiss study, published in 2000 showed that “it is the religious practice of the father of the family that, above all, determines the future church attendance of the children.”

Mother attends church regularly. Father does not attend church at all:

2% of their children will end up attending church regularly

60% of their children will end up not attending at all

Father attends church regularly. Mother does not attend church at all:

44% of their children will end up attending church regularly

34% of their children will end up not attending at all

Do you even realise the power of your own words?

Q How does a curs come upon a person?... “With our mouths” We curs our own children, wives and husbands daily...

You are “always”: late, poor, slow, unloving, not cleaver enough, not strong enough, not pretty enough.

Proverbs 10:11

The mouth of the [uncompromisingly] righteous man is a well of life, but the mouth of the wicked conceals violence.

Proverbs 18:21

Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and they who indulge in it shall eat the fruit of it [for death or life].

“Don’t run you WILL fall”

“Don’t do that you WILL fail”

Q Are the fears we have, being projected as curses, with which we wear down our own flesh and blood?

Ask the Holy Spirit to show you a moment in time, when you where cursed by someone who loved you, that might have stopped you from being the best family member you possibly can be.

EXTRA

Ephesians 6

4 Fathers, do not irritate and provoke your children to anger [do not exasperate them to resentment], but rear them [tenderly] in the training and discipline and the counsel and admonition of the Lord.